| This is Part I of a two part article. The second article, | | | | would be of greater concern. |
| which is titled "She May Have a TBI, but She Can Still | | | | The third group, on the other hand, is very clear that |
| Make Me Laugh," was written by my husband about | | | | disability dating is not for them. They feel that dealing |
| his concerns dating and marrying a disabled person, i.e. | | | | with the disability would mean a huge responsibility, |
| me. | | | | especially if it was a permanent one. They are |
| There have been numerous studies and articles on the | | | | reluctant to shoulder the additional burden a disabled |
| pros and cons of people with disabilities dating each | | | | person might present on top of the normal pressures |
| other or dating someone, who does not have a | | | | of a relationship. I certainly fell into this group. I am |
| disability. As someone, who has a traumatic brain injury | | | | disabled. In my view, I needed to pair myself with |
| and who has been married to a blind man for almost | | | | someone, who was completely normal. |
| six years, let me provide you with some | | | | However, just three months of dating my husband |
| encouragement as you head down what may seem | | | | dispelled this belief. My husband is an incredible man |
| to be an uncertain road when it comes to dating or | | | | and an even more incredible blind man. Together, we |
| marrying a disabled person. | | | | have shattered the image of what blind people can |
| According to an article by Peter Finch in this magazine, | | | | accomplish and he, personally, has taught me to |
| "studies on attitudes to dating disabled persons have | | | | embrace life again. (Something I had been afraid to do |
| shown that there are largely three groups of people." | | | | after suffering my traumatic brain injury.) |
| The largest group consists of those who would decide | | | | In short, I moved from being a member of the third |
| on disabled dating on the basis of the specific disability | | | | group to the second group. I ultimately came to the |
| of their potential partner and how confident they would | | | | conclusion that dating a disabled person was not |
| feel in the situation. | | | | necessarily a recipe for a disaster. What keeps our |
| The second group consists of those who stress that it | | | | marriage on a sound footing is the same thing that |
| would make no difference to them if their potential | | | | keeps any marriage or relationship on a sound footing |
| partner suffered from a disability. They feel that having | | | | - communication. My husband may be blind, but he can |
| a disability would merely physically limit certain things | | | | still speak. He offers me words of encouragement, |
| their partner could or could not do but would not make | | | | kindness, and days filled with laughter. He has exposed |
| him or her any different otherwise. The partner's | | | | me to a world, which is not constrained by what you |
| character, rather than his or her physical appearance, | | | | can do physically. |