| People complain. They're complaining all the time about | | | | our society, put away behind walls so we don't have |
| everything. As a child, I was innocent enough to believe | | | | to confront them? They are the disabled, the diseased, |
| what people were saying. I really thought there were | | | | the dangerous ones, the mentally retarded or disturbed, |
| plenty of valid reasons to complain: the weather (most | | | | those who are too slow (they go to special schools), |
| often), lack of money (runner-up), the neighbors, | | | | too difficult to handle (they go to educational |
| husband or wife, the children (me, in this case), | | | | institutions) and those who are too tired and too old |
| civilization (or the lack of it), bad health, etc. I assumed | | | | (we put them in expensive homes). There in Africa, |
| the world just turned out to be like this and there was | | | | everybody stays in his own village and is accepted |
| nothing much we could do. It was called "fate" or | | | | and taken care of (except the really dangerous ones, |
| something. The thing to do was to pray. Not to ask for | | | | they go to prison). Everybody has a natural social |
| a better life. No! I learned to pray to ask God to forgive | | | | network and access to help. You are not isolated from |
| me for my sins. I was a nice little girl, doing very well at | | | | society merely because you cannot walk or because |
| school, polite with the neighbors, helpful at home, so it | | | | you are mentally slow. They stick together. I figured |
| was rather difficult to keep finding sins for our weekly | | | | out that inner loneliness and isolation is one of the main |
| confession. But because human beings are profoundly | | | | reasons why we are complaining so much. The |
| sinful by birth, they told me, I had to go confess | | | | second difference is that all of these people are |
| anyway. The nuns at school came up with a solution | | | | connected to something "greater" than themselves. |
| to help us out: they "prepared" our sins for us. Every | | | | They have a strong faith in a god who takes care of |
| Wednesday, on confession day, they gave us a pink | | | | them. They spend a lot of time performing rituals to |
| paper with our "confessions of the day." I remember | | | | please their god(s) and get good health and harvest in |
| feeling sorry for the poor priest, hidden in his little black | | | | return. I gave these two differences a lot of thought |
| cabin, spending the entire day listening to the | | | | and concluded that creating social networks of people |
| confessions of 600 little girls, endlessly repeating the | | | | and a solid relationship with something bigger than |
| same sins over and over… Growing up, I | | | | ourselves, are vitally important fundaments of human |
| figured something was missing. Pretending to be sinful | | | | happiness. It's all about "connection." Connection to |
| by repeating sins someone else had cooked up for | | | | each other. Connection to the Universe. In the |
| me, that could not be what life is about. I refused to | | | | meantime I found out that good things can happen only |
| further confess sins that I had not committed. I refused | | | | when we stay connected to each other and to the |
| to believe that I was the cause of my misery, and that | | | | Universe. I started studying the Laws of the Universe |
| I had to pray every day without things getting better! | | | | and spent a lot of energy helping people establish a |
| When I was 26, I went to Africa. There I met my | | | | connection to each other and to the Universe. In fact, |
| husband (he's from Belgium) and together we had a | | | | this became the very purpose of my life. Many people |
| wonderful time, with plenty of sunshine and plenty of | | | | think they are alone, without help, and have to do |
| money; circumstances people usually don't complain | | | | everything by themselves. This is not the case. You |
| about, right? According to my childhood logic, people | | | | are guided, you are loved by Something Greater than |
| only complain for a reason: lousy weather (too cold, | | | | your little personality. Try to feel this connection. Take |
| too much rain), lack of money, etc. But what I | | | | time everyday to connect to the Source. Do like the |
| discovered over there seriously opened my eyes! My | | | | African people I was lucky to meet so many years |
| "white" friends just went on complaining: about the | | | | ago: create a real connection between yourself, the |
| weather (too hot), about the service (5 servants and | | | | Universe and people around you, without being overly |
| still they were complaining) or about how things were | | | | dependent on others. You will never feel alone again |
| too expensive - while they were earning 5 times as | | | | and you will be able to spread a lot more love around. |
| much as before! I discovered there and then that the | | | | Living this kind of "connected life" will make you forget |
| complaining was not based on any objective reasons. I | | | | about your former complaints. What's there to |
| also noticed that the black people, who were living in | | | | complain about? Your complaints will be replaced by |
| their villages with close to nothing, were not | | | | gratitude! Say "thank you" to the Universe for all the |
| complaining. I got interested in this phenomenon: they | | | | things you already have, and for all the wonders that |
| had nothing except a big smile on their face, while we | | | | may still cross your path. Express your sincere |
| had everything and were still complaining! How could | | | | gratitude for all the love you have received and will |
| this be? It became crystal clear to me that the | | | | keep receiving throughout your life. Be grateful for the |
| complaints had nothing to do with the outer | | | | clean water coming out of the tap by a simple gesture |
| circumstances. It was an attitude, a habit. Next, I | | | | of your hand, while many people spend six hours |
| wanted to find out where this habit came from. So I | | | | every day to get a little bit of water, and others die of |
| examined the way of life of the local people and | | | | thirst. Be grateful for the light you switch on with a |
| compared it with our way of life. When I finally came | | | | simple flick. Large parts of the world have to do |
| up with the explanation, it changed my life forever! | | | | without electric power! Say "thank you" for the variety |
| There are two important differences between them | | | | of food that is available to you every day - a lot of |
| and us. The first difference is that they have a social | | | | people have to get by on one scarce meal a day, or |
| network to help everyone in the village. They stick | | | | are simply starving. There is so much to be grateful |
| together. They don't push out people who don't fit the | | | | for. I felt so ashamed there in Africa, at 26 years old, |
| norm. In our society, everybody who is a bit different is | | | | hearing my white friends, bathing in luxury but still |
| sent to an "institution." An institution is a place to collect | | | | complaining, while my black friends, who had close to |
| those individuals who cannot follow the fast pace of | | | | nothing, were laughing, friendly, grateful and most of the |
| society and thus fall out of the boat. Most institutions | | | | time quite happy with the little things in life. It's all in the |
| have great walls to prevent us from "seeing" that | | | | mind. Gratitude and happiness are an attitude, a state |
| these people really exist. They look more like a prison | | | | of being. It has nothing to do with circumstances. The |
| than a shelter. Who are these people that don't fit in | | | | attitude is gratitude. |