| Just imagine if someone whacked you over
| |
| | feeling good." We cannot see how they
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| the head with a 2x4, speared you with a
| |
| | feel on the inside, from the outside.
|
| tranquilizer dart, scrubbed your skin
| |
| | 2) Learn to be aware of their symptoms,
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| with sandpaper, stuck pins and needles in
| |
| | despite how chipper they may appear
|
| your arms and legs and strapped 20 pound
| |
| | during our visit with them. After all,
|
| weights to each leg. You probably would
| |
| | they smile because they enjoy seeing us;
|
| not feel like going window shopping or
| |
| | they are trying to keep a positive
|
| jogging around the park! Your friend or
| |
| | outlook, despite the pain, not because
|
| relative may be suffering like this deep
| |
| | they feel good and are doing well.
|
| inside, even though they appear to be
| |
| | 3) Do not push for them to tell us they
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| fine on the outside! Nevertheless, many
| |
| | are "having a good day," if they are not.
|
| loved ones do not understand how a person
| |
| | Some have mostly good days and some bad;
|
| with MS may feel on the inside.
| |
| | some have mostly bad and some good; some
|
| Our natural instincts tell us that when
| |
| | do not have good days at all and feel
|
| something is broken, we must fix it. On
| |
| | sick and in pain all of the time. We
|
| the other hand, it is crucial for us to
| |
| | should allow them to be honest.
|
| allow people with MS to make necessary
| |
| | 4) Acknowledge what they are going
|
| changes according to their limitations.
| |
| | through as a very real, difficult time
|
| In order to contend with the illness,
| |
| | that may mean a few or even a whole lot
|
| they must avoid overdoing and
| |
| | of changes and losses. They do not
|
| overexertion or their symptoms will
| |
| | require our complete understanding, just
|
| worsen. Therefore, it is very important
| |
| | our belief in them.
|
| to remember that they know what they can
| |
| | 5) Respect their limitations. When a
|
| and cannot do, in order to manage their
| |
| | person has MS, they must manage their
|
| MS.
| |
| | condition by staying within boundaries.
|
| We should not feel as if we need to
| |
| | Over-doing oneself only leads to increase
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| "cheer" them back to the "way they were
| |
| | in symptoms. We must allow them to say
|
| before." Remember, your loved one did not
| |
| | "no," even if we do not fully understand.
|
| choose to have this disorder and they
| |
| | 6) Tell them how much we admire their
|
| will fight every day to keep their dreams
| |
| | strength and determination. Many times
|
| and desires alive. Believe me, no one
| |
| | people living with illness are treated
|
| would like to have their life back more
| |
| | like they are just being weak or lazy.
|
| than your loved one. Nonetheless, not
| |
| | But, if we examine the evidence, we will
|
| accepting the way they are with MS will
| |
| | find someone who actually has incredible
|
| only make them feel isolated and less
| |
| | courage.
|
| important to you.
| |
| | How can we help? We can try offering to
|
| In fact, the last thing they want is to
| |
| | pick something up from the store when we
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| be forced to give up those activities and
| |
| | go, bringing them a picnic lunch,
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| dreams in their lives that are dear to
| |
| | vacuuming their floors or sending them a
|
| them. Yet, when they push themselves
| |
| | note to say we care. They already feel
|
| beyond their limitations, they can become
| |
| | like a burden, so we should not wait for
|
| much worse. As a consequence, increased
| |
| | them to call us for help.
|
| stress, exposure to heat and overtaxing
| |
| | Finally, people with MS do not want pity,
|
| oneself can all cause a relapse,
| |
| | they simply need our compassion and
|
| exacerbation of symptoms or even further
| |
| | support. We should not worry that
|
| permanent damage.
| |
| | addressing their hurdles will discourage
|
| The best way to support a loved one in
| |
| | them! After all, ignoring what they are
|
| this situation is to allow them to say,
| |
| | facing, minimizing it and acting like it
|
| "no" when they feel they need to, even
| |
| | is no big deal, will only leaving them
|
| when we do not totally understand "why."
| |
| | feeling like we do not have any idea how
|
| If they are repeatedly asked to do what
| |
| | what they are going through.
|
| they have told us they cannot handle,
| |
| | No one facing an illness wants to hear
|
| this will only add to their frustration,
| |
| | their losses are insignificant and
|
| feelings of worthlessness and mourning of
| |
| | meaningless. We can validate their
|
| their losses. Moreover, they will feel
| |
| | challenges, by acknowledging their
|
| alone in their suffering, because we
| |
| | difficulties and losses. This will give
|
| evidently do not understand or respect
| |
| | them strength and hope to know we are
|
| these limitations, which are out of their
| |
| | standing by them with compassion. Most of
|
| control.
| |
| | all, when we let them know that we see
|
| So, What Can We Do? 1) Avoid the
| |
| | them as the courageous, strong,
|
| temptation to make a visual diagnosis by
| |
| | determined people that they are, they
|
| stating, "Gee, you look like you are
| |
| | will fight even harder!
|
